TMI Tuesday @ 3/5/2013

Oh my. Questions about Lent. The last thing I expected was Lent TMI. Well, here goes…

1. What did you give up for lent?

Damn all. I was never big for formal observance of Lent.

2. What sexually could you never give up?

My wife.

Way back when puberty was being invented just in time to embarrass and confuse me, I tried giving up masturbation for Lent. Of course, I didn’t tell anyone. I failed.

3. What act would you like to do for 40 days and 40 nights?

In the middle of sex, it seems like the only really sensible way to spend one’s time, but, in the afterglow, other questions arise, like who’s going to make dinner. So, forty days might seem like forever.

I can almost imagine an extended role play in which I acted like a Sugar Daddy for six weeks, wooing and screwing a chorus girl. (Do they still have chorus girls?)

4. What sexual sacrifice have you made? Why?

I don’t press my wife for sex more often than her natural inclination allows.

5. Have you ever been tied to a cross or anything else?

No. I’d probably be the tie-er, not the tie-ee.

6. What part of your body do you like worshiped?

TLC for any erogenous zone is sufficient.

7. What can your partner do to you that makes you feel true bliss?

Hand work. It’s under appreciated.

Bonus: Tell us about a time you were tempted. Did you give in or resist?

Just this last week, I was buying my dinner and I was tempted by the thought of something chocolate. I gave in. Willingly. Ironically, the sandwich I got was big, and I was so stuffed, I only ate one cookie.

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